When the baby emerged, I was horrified to see that he was rather blue! (this is known as cyanosis, which means blueness caused by a lack of oxygen). What made worse was the fact that he was NOT crying even after a few minutes.
The baby was dying … …

Quickly, the neonatologist ( specialist doctor for babies under 28 days of age) resuscitated him by giving him oxygen. In my heart, I prayed that the baby will survive.

“Live!!!” I told myself silently. At that moment, suddenly nothing else matters anymore, except that the baby survive.

Fortunately, after a few minutes of resuscitation, the baby let out a cry… …

Similar for love……

When you notice that the love between you and your partner is fading, nothing else in the world matters, except that the love continues to survive. You may try various ways and means to resuscitate the dying love, but ultimately, you may think that whatever you do is much dependent on heaven’s will.

At Love Clinic, our algorithm to resuscitate love is CPR.

C = Communication
P = Problem Solving
R = Reassurance

Communicate effectively about what is going wrong. Try to solve the inherent problems between the 2 of you and finally reassure the other party that he/she is the only one you love.

Hopefully with CPR, you can resuscitate the dying love …

* Caesarian Section: the delivery of the baby by a surgical cut through the abdominal wall.
** when the baby is positioned legs down instead of head down in a pregnant woman.

There are basically 3 types of marriage partners.

The first type (type I) are those who couldn’t care less in life. These kind of people live their days without any ultimate goal or general plans. As there is no motivating factor in their lives, their lives are pretty laid back and to a certain extent, messy. If you marry someone like this, you will probably end up living a boring life.

The second type (type II) are those who only care about themselves.They put themselves first in whatever they do and tend to neglect their partners. Spending your entire life with such a person is miserable as you will feel unloved every day.

The third type (type III) are those who not only care about themselves, but also care for their partners. These are the few rare gems available in this world and should you find one, do grab immediately. This type of partners are the most ideal and life with them will be truely blissful and perfect.

End of article.

So what if you manage to find a type III? If you are a type II yourself, your relationship will suffer. So what if 2 type Is marry each other? Will there be a guaranteed divorce? Even if 2 type IIIs meet, is there a promise of eternal love?

I guess ultimately, the best solution is to be a type III yourself. Even if you realise that your spouse is a type I or type II, you will be certain that the person you love most in life will be assured of forever happiness.

In that situation, 2 criminal accomplices were caught and put into 2 different cells. They were told that if both of them do not confess, they will be given 2 years each. If both confess to the crime, it will be 4 years of imprisonment each. If one of them confesses while the other didn’t, the confessor can make a deal with the police and will go off scot free while the other ends up in jail for 5 years.

This creates a dilemma. If you were A, should you just deny and hope that B denies as well so that both of you get a lighter sentence? Or should he just make B the scapegoat and hope for a chance to get away scot free?

The same theory is applicable for love and relationships. Often, one party does not trust the other person. In the end, he/she puts in less effort and love into the relationship as he or she should. No doubt by doing so, that person ensures that he/she will not be at the losing end of the relationship. However, if the other party thinks the same way, then both parties, for fear of being in the giving end of the relationship, will not put as much effort in to making love work. Both parties will lose out as a result.

However, if both parties were to trust each other completely and co-operate, then I guess there won’t be anything called “The Lover’s Dilemma”.

In the movie, it was mentioned that 1224 and 1225 (christmas eve and christmas day) are the days when people need the most “warmth”. It is a day when people without partners will most likely long to have someone to go out with, or take part in a group activity.

It is actually an opportunity now to use this festive season to your advantage.

If you are still single, take this chance to ask the person of your dreams out. It is less likely for her to turn you down (unless she already has a date). Join Christmas parties and during the party, approach more people. You can try to know people by approaching them during Christmas parties, saying “Hi. Merry Christmas! I am XXX. You are?” Usually during the festive season, most people are in the elated mood and they will not do anything to dampen their festive spirits. Hence, reassure that they will engage in a pretty interesting conversation with you!

Finally, here is wishing all a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I hope that 1224 and 1225 will not be mere numbers to you, but the days when you find your true love!

Friend: I just missed an opportunity to make 3K. So sian.

Chelestiar: What happened?

Friend: I missed an investment chance.

Chelestiar: Don’t be too sad about it. Missing an opportunity to make 3K is better than gaining an opportunity to lose 3K.

Friend: They are actually the same.

Chelestiar: No. They are actually different! One situation is missing an opportunity to have a girlfriend. The other situation is having a girlfriend, but in the end, she is snatched away by others.

At this point in time, I suddenly realised that they are the same. Because in both situations, you end up being alone.

In life, would you rather give an opportunity to be with someone a miss, because you foresee that the relationship will not turn to marriage? Or would you rather be together with that person, enjoy the short term blissfulness of a happy relationship but later, endure the pain of an inevitable break up?

I guess there is no right or wrong answer to this question. Ultimately it depends on whether the individual is one who prefers short term pain or long term suffering.

Think of it this way. If you missed earning 3K at one place, it may mean that you will get to earn 5K in another place

There was one game in the entire tournament that made me learn a valueable lesson.

For that game, my opponent sacrificed a knight to me. For that short term material advantage, I ate it without thinking much. In the end, he gained much attacking advantage. The entire situation became very bad for me and I had to resign after a few moves.

This is true for relationships as well.

Initially, you may be attracted to that hot babe. You know for yourself that you lust for her more than you love her. For the girls, it may be an rich guy who pampers you with the most expensive gifts. You know for yourself that you love his money more than you love him as a person.

You jumped into a relationship for those short term benefits. In the end, you got what you want, but failed to see the long run and the big picture. Things became bad and the relationship soured to a point where it became unsalvageable. You made a hasty exit. You wondered if you have not been mesmerised by those short term gains and think more long term, perhaps you can avoid this heartache all together.

Till now, I was still thinking if I have not eaten his knight, I could perhaps avoid the defeat and gotten a higher ranking for the tournament.

But so what if I have gotten a higher ranking for the tournament? I would have still enjoyed the whole process just as much!

‘One of my close friends smsed tonight. She told me that the girl I like is behaving rather closely with another guy. She asked if they are attached.

I knew this all along. I don’t mind being number 2.’

End of Story.

What is it really like to be number 2?

In life, we all strive to come in first. Be it in sports, studies, work … For everything we do, we are determined to put in our best so that we will be put at a higher position than the rest. People are rewarded for coming in first. In presidential elections, the candidate with the most number of votes get to rule the country, while the candidate with the second highest number of votes disappear behind the scene. In the sports field, the gold medalist gets the honour and cash. The silver medalist gets something as well, but not as much.

How about love?

In life, it is very rare that we are someone else’s first love. As first love is always the most memorable, deep in the hearts of our partners, there will always be a spot reserved for that special first boyfriend/girlfriend which no one else can replace. There are also times when your partner harbour so deep a crush for another person (who may be attached, married or single but have no feelings for your partner such that he/she has no choice but to end up being with you), that you know that however hard you try, you will still be unable to replace that person. So theoretically, for some relationships, you will always end up being number 2.

Sad to say, this situation can’t be reversed in most cases.

The only solution -

Love her 100% To her, you may be her number 2. But to you, she will always be your number 1.

She went first to a polyclinic. There, the doctor gave her some panadol. Her symptoms did not subside.

After 1-2 days, she went to a local general practitioner. Her symptoms still did not subside despite the medication.

Finally she went to a third doctor who did not prescribe anything too different. She became well.

She then conclude that the last doctor is the best.

The whole incident reminded me of a chinese saying - ” The last doctor cures the illness”.

What my friend suffered from is most likely a viral fever. We all know that viral fevers are self limiting and subside within a few days’ time, regardless of the medication given.

The last doctor whom she saw may not necessarily be the best. Just that she met him at the point when she is recovering.

The person whom you marry eventually may not be the one you love most. Many a times, he/she is the one who appears in your life at the right time (i.e. when you are you at the “due for marriage” age).

Your last love may not be the best, but you should try your best to make it last.

May you have a happy relationship!

The buffet spread was fantastic! There was cuisine from the various countries. In the end, both of us were stuffed.

At this point, I asked her whether she would rather be too full or too hungry.

” I’ll rather be full.” came the reply.

For me, I will rather be hungry.

If you are hungry, there is always something to look forward to. You can dream about the sizzling food which will come later. You can also dream about that first bite of food when it is served. But if you are too full, I don’t think there is anything to look forward to, except vomiting, which helps relieve your bloatedness. But well, puking isn’t exactly something which you will like to think about.

Hunger vs satiety …This made me think … Would you rather be in a relationship that is full of tension, threatening to snap any moment? Or would you rather stay single?

None of the 2 options are good.

I should not have eaten too much on that day.