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Event Highlights

Keys To A Wonderful First Date

A Love Clinic Seminar at
Social and Development Unit (SDU)

15 Oct 2005

Love Clinic was cordially invited by SDU to give a talk on "Keys To A Wonderful First Date" at their clubhouse along Stevens Road. The talk was very well received with close to 30 members turning up.

A lively Question and Answer Session followed with some interesting points raised.  We shall highlight some controversial questions raised and the learning points we gathered.

Q: "We are very busy people. Many of us work past 7pm and are very tired after work so we have very little time to go for dates. You know, sometimes we will only assess the opposite party over the phone. Only if they "pass" the phone round, will we allow ourselves to go out with them on a date. Is there any short cut to finding out what a person is without spending too much time going on dates?"

A: "It is true that many of us are preoccupied with work. No wonder some say that Singaporeans may make one of the most unromantic lovers. It really depends on what a person's priority in life is. If he just wants to be a successful person without a wife or husband, so be it.

However, one has to realise that there are many aspects to life. One can concentrate on building a career and become a CEO at the age of 40 but he may have missed out on romance. He is a success in his career but a failure when it comes to family life. Personally I think it is better to strike a balance.

Phone conversations has its limitations. Phone conversation only contains one of the modalities of communication and that is the voice. The other modalities such as visual and touch are absent. Body language is definitely absent from a phone conversation.

There really isn't any shortcut to dating. Dating is one of the most effective ways in finding out if your dream guy or girl is really what you think him/her out to be.  Going out together also lets you experience what is it like to be together at that moment and whether or not you are feeling at ease with each other.

Q: What do guys think of girls who make the first move? Will they be turned off? What are some of the ways that girls may hint without being seen to be overly aggressive?

I feel that nowadays with our modern society, there's really nothing wrong in girls making the first move. There are many advantages. For one, girls can now pursue for their dream guy instead of waiting and then choosing from the limited pool of guys who are yearning for her. I think the modern guy will find the girl who make the first move a unique person who is frank in expressing her opinions. This is also one of the traits for a successful relationship. Most guy's would not be turned off. It really depends on how the guy feels about the girl. If he does have some good feelings for the girl, the relationship will definitely blossom.

Girls can hint by simply being nice to the guy. You can be more accommodating towards him and laugh at his jokes. You will look forward to his phone calls and will provide much content for whatever conversation you may have instead of simple one word answers.

Love Clinic advises ladies out there to be frank with your feelings. If you do like a guy, let him know. It is up to him whether or not he wants to return the ball to your side of the court.





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